Tomb Raider Review

No, the newest Lara Croft isn't about gawking at an inadequately clothed title heroine as she kicks ass. It's nothing like the previous two movies with Angelina Jolie, but it is not nearly as good. It takes itself far too seriously, forcing a backstory on Laura that's unsurprising. Guess what? Her father's dead, and she decides to finish his work. It's an uninspired riff on "The Last Crusade," and it just doesn't work. Well, for the first half anyway.

"Tomb Raider" is two movies stitched together with only one being any good. That'd be the second half, where we find Lara (Alicia Vikander) enter a tomb, set off some booby traps, unleash some evil then escape while it crumbs just behind her. It's some fun, about as good as the Brendan Fraser's original "Mummy" movie, though not as good as any of the "Indiana Jones" flicks.

The plot in detail finds Lara in pursuit of Himiko, an ancient evil queen buried deep underground on a remote island. She takes his notes, hitching a ride on a rusty old boat that soon capsizes and she, with the help of movie magic, washes ashore. Of course, her father's rival (or colleague, or.. something), Vogel (Dominic West) is on the island, searching the last seven years for the location of the mummified royal lady. Of course (of course!) her father's papers show the location of the tomb, and now she, and the captain of the dingy they sailed there on must plot their way out of slavery before Vogel can dig up evil. By this point, the story is so wildly silly that it allows the action to become equally preposterous- it's gloriously goofy fun.

It's just that the first half, the parts leading up to the unearthing of the catacombs are so dull. We find Lara piece together the whereabouts of her father, her struggles as an underdog and well, it just isn't anything special. It's actually exceptionally average- nothing's offensive, but there is just nothing to recommend.

This film gets two stars, because I can only endorse the second half. For all the fun puzzle solving, lavishly decrepit set pieces, and haunted skeleton-stuffed coffins, you deal with about an hour of boring exposition, despite its brisk pace jumping from the streets of London to a fishing village in Japan. It's a shame it takes so long for a movie called "Tomb Raider" to actually enter a tomb, but trust me, it's kinda almost worth the wait.

Death Wish Review

A film like "Death Wish" can never come out at a good time, but despite general critic reception, this remake is a fairly taut little thriller. Paul Kersey (Bruce Willis), a surgeon whose wife is killed and daughter is left in a coma after a violent home invasion, questions gun store employee Bethany (Kirby Bliss Blanton) about the process of purchasing a gun in Chicago. "Oh, no one fails the test" she says, or something like that. He does not walk out with a piece, but gives a satirical nod to the camera at how painless the process is. How could a movie be pro-gun if it comments on how easy it is to buy and use them?

But Kersey doesn't get his first gun and suddenly become "John McClane," he fumbles, slicing his hand at his first stab at vigilantism. It is a refreshing change from these usual movies, where the hero is some ex-military guy or cop- Paul's a doctor! I mean sure, he does become a pretty good shot by the time the credits roll, but with every bullet fired he becomes a bit more confident pulling the trigger. Bruce is surprisingly good at this; despite his career as action star, he looks uncomfortable at the prospects of owning and using a gun, and turns to online tutorials on how to clean, load and fire them. He's convincing here, every bit as fit for the role as Charles Bronson was. It isn't glorifying violence, it is a commentary on how easy it is for someone to become so aggressive.

End social observation.

Director Eli Roth, of the bloody "Hostel" movies fame, is surprisingly restraint here, with all the expected gory bits cut down to quick cuts, barely shown. Why the intestines spill in the first place show just how deteriorated Kersey is, as his vigilante episodes become less about killing and more about torture. The camera never fetishises on the blood, with it lasting only a few seconds on screen, but he handles the slower moments with general finesse, giving Bruce a chance to do things other than his usual reluctant-hero schtick. The supporting cast, including Vincent D'Onofrio as his brother Frank and Elisabeth Shue as his brief wife, bring more to the screen than the script asks them for.

Just like in the original film, Paul has a couple of detectives nearby, who grow to suspect of him, just one piece of evidence away from convicting him. But new here is that his first act of vengeance is caught on camera and posted around social media. It floods the internet, radio talk shows, and leads to at least one copy-cat on the streets of Chicago. It is a decent refresh of musty old material. Things do wrap up in the end a bit too cleanly, but that's how the first one did, so why change it?

As a remake, it gets the job done for those looking for something more extreme than your usual Liam Neeson outing. It is less excessive than the sequels that followed the 1974 original, and about on par with 2007's "Death Sentence," based on the the book sequel to the first book. (Yeah, somehow a franchise like "Death Wish" is complicated. Also, somehow it is a franchise.) Without the politically charged world outside the multiplex, it is a movie where people shoot each other. If you liked last year's "The Foreigner," I probably sat next to you in the theater.