Kids have it easy when it comes to entertainment; they don't challenge what's happening onscreen, question character motivations and are more than satisfied with the incompetent. And if an adult can somehow channel that mindset for just two hours, then they'll have one helluva time with "Dynasty Warriors," based on the popular video game. I know I did.
... But I didn't start out that way. For the first, oh I dunno, fifteen minutes or so, I paid attention. I tried to remember the names of people and places as they were spoken and appeared in localized subtitles. Then something happened, something came over me. It was my childhood. This innocence allowed my normally critical eye to succumb it its exaggerated excess, where people in elaborate costumes and makeup leap dozens of feet in the air while battling with preposterous swords. Where every important character rides horses and trees can be chopped down by lightning summoned from the evil Lu Bu (Louis Koo). Somehow though this gets even more ridiculous, but I won't spoil it for you. I sat on my couch with pure wonder and awe, sucked in perhaps by my subconscious lust for my own youth.
Or maybe it's the film's pacing, which is rarely boring. Or was it the decorated set pieces, with not an extra out of place. Or was it its unflinching dedication to style, where thousands of (probably CGI) armies clash with the occasional spurt of blood as the camera pans left, only to suddenly swoop right, then cut to a bizarre angle, then its back to battle. No wait, that's not it at all.
Where "Dynasty Warriors" succeeds is that it's fun, plain and simple. It's simultaneously complicated and not, a common war tale of royalty, revenge, and devotion, but also one filled with betrayal, corruption and fate. Just don't think that much about it. Nuance is forsaken, any substance beneath its polished exterior of violence ignored in favor of professional purity. It's a sense of enjoyment in its most basic form, filmmaking distilled into uncontaminated amusement for all your eyes and ears, just not your brain. The flick not only expects but demands that you put blinders on to logic and just hang on for the ride.
Its actual plot is inconsequential- I mean, how could they summarize a franchise with nine mainline entries (eight if you live in Japan, it's... complicated), not to mention all the spinoffs, which have their own sequels. At least, that is if my cursory knowledge of the brand isn't failing me, but I digress.
But how can I recommend this movie; three and a half stars, what's happening?! But then again why can't I? At the end of the day (or er, well film), I knew I had spent my time wisely. I chortled at the chubby Zhang Fei (Justin Cheung), who's paunch never got in the way of his blade. And during during a climatic moment where he, alongside his friends Liu Bei (Tony Yang) and Guan Yu (Han Geng) combat their aforementioned antagonist down a river, I caught myself mesmerized in the awful special effects, the moment where I let go of any remaining hesitation I had, to fully commit myself to living in its world of absolute absurdity.
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