Halloween Ends Review

It's amazing to think that David Gordon Green, who directed 2018's "Halloween," not only directed the awful sequel last year with "Halloween Kills" but also this year's "Halloween Ends." Why is that amazing? Because the first one was so good and damn, what a fluke that ended up being.

OK maybe "Halloween Kills" isn't Mr. Green's fault- looking at the franchise's history, the series usually comes back after a few years with a surprisely decent entry ("4: Return of Michael Myers," "H20: 20 Years Later," "2007's Halloween"), only to be immediately followed by absolute dreck ("5: Revenge of Michael Myers," "Resurrection," 2009's Halloween 2"). It's a tradition, and he was simply following suit. 

And gosh I hope I got all those titles right.

I thought that this leaves this newest and supposedly final flick as a bit of an outlier at first, but then I recalled 1995's "Curse of Michael Myers," an awkward follow-up to "Revenge," a film which has two cuts but remains the worst of the bunch regardless.

Anyway, "Halloween Ends" isn't any good either, though an improvement over many sequels. What it's missing is unobtainable by default: purpose. The very first one, by John Carpenter, came to existence because he was a budding young director; he did it for experience. And money. The problem with every sequel is that it's only ever done for money. But anytime there's a gap in releases, there's curiosity to the works. "What's different this time?" the audience wonders. "Ends" just doesn't have that. It was made out of obligation to the plot, which to me was singlehandedly satisfyingly closed in 2018's reboot. But it was successful, so here we are.

For one thing, there are story issues: this time, we follow Corey (Rohan Campbell), an outcast who accidently caused the death of a young boy he was babysitting. Usually in these stories, the babysitter is a girl, so this piqued by interest immediately. What was Michael Myers going to do with a teenager male who failed to save the child in his care? Take him under his wing, of course.

We flash forward a few years to find Corey found innocent, but only to the law. Throughout the fictional town of Haddonfield, Illinois, folks hate him. It's not until a minor altercation with some highschoolers that he meets Laurie Strode (Jamie Lee Curtis), who then introduces him to her granddaughter Allyson (Andi Matichak). The two hit it off and have this uncomfortable goth-esque romance which is totally and tonally at odds with the rest of the picture. They have no chemistry together as she grips him tightly on his motorcycle (neither of which are wearing helmets, very irresponsible). Anytime she's not hanging on his arm, she's a nurse helping people, all perky with problems like real people involving her career. She's a real character anytime she isn't making puppy-dog eyes.

Corey, on the other hand, spends his time sulking around like misunderstood youth and killing people who've done him or her wrong, with Michael either showing up or not. Eventually he convinces her to flee town with him, since all that's left there is hate. Why are they acting like idiots, they just met! Aren't they like in their twenties?

So where does that leave Laurie? What about Michael? Is he in control of "the shape?" Is it the other way around? Are they somehow connected? How has nobody found all the bodies left around? What the hell is going on!?

Well Laurie knows what's going on because she "saw it in his eyes," but when she confronts Allyson with her "gut feeling," she decides to act like a teenager and disregard anything the woman who's dealt with death for decades has to say. I don't normally say this about films with four credited screenwriters (Paul Brad Logan, Chris Bernier, Danny McBride and David Gordan Green), but we really could have used another pass by fresh eyes on the ol' typewriter.

But this is a horror movie, so narrative is not exactly the most important thing. It's atmosphere, tension, thrills and bloodshed, and all "Halloween Ends" has is the latter. I can only think of one good scene, where a radio DJ (Keraun Harris) meets his doom, and after his face is smashed into the desk, his tongue is cut out and falls on the turntable. The music skips as the needle hits it. It's a nice touch, but man am I grasping for straws here for positives.