Saturday, August 6, 2022

They/Them Review

You either die a horny camp counselor or live long enough to become a camp owner. Kevin Bacon is of course the exception, having famously died in 1980's "Friday the 13th" as the former and now headlines "They/Them," another "in the woods" slasher that is just as dopey and trashy, but only time will tell if it becomes a franchise too.

The veteran actor stars as Owen, owner of a conversion camp who's fresh attendees just rolled up for a week of "fun," or so they're told. What really happens are sessions in gender stereotypes, from the women baking to the men shooting guns. The campers seldom put up much of a fuss, ranging from swearing or rolling their eyes, but for long stretches of the runtime, nothing happens. Their frustration is unexplored, and so we just see archaic customs preached by the grownups, the teenagers complain about what's going on, blah blah blah.

This absence of tension leads to the bloodshed feeling out-of-place, as I never felt that kids had any reason to truly despise the adults so much that they'd resort to murder, or that the adults honestly hated the kids enough that they'd slice them up. This left few suspects as to who could actually be the killer, but hey wow now, that's spoiler territory.

The slashings are all very "been there, scene that before," but the same cannot be said about the sex scenes. We get two, well more like two and a half, but if there's one aspect of filmmaking where "They/Them" skirts conventions, it's here. Even if it doesn't add much except to show naked flesh.

Owen as a character has the absolute bare minimum of development or backstory, except that he has a wife (Carrie Preston), believes in god, and apparently hates those who identify as something other than "man," woman," or "straight," and probably in that order. Why he even owns a camp like this is a mystery, or what his ultimate gain in all this is, except that he's apparently been doing it for a while. Yet Bacon is fabulous, changing the entire tone of whatever conversation he's in by just shifting his eyes, changing his tone- he's such, such a great actor and the entire production is elevated simply by his grace on the screen.

The entire cast is actually pretty great, from the trans Jordan (Theo Germaine) to the former camper turned counselor Zane (Boone Platt), but there are far too many campers, some who don't even get a line of dialogue, they just fit an expectation. Are all the talking roles too "perfect" or "pretty?" Don't worry, there's a larger quinary character in the background- now we're really inclusive.

As for the portrayals of the various sexual orientations, they range from complex to completely conventional, so much so that it's difficult to properly put them in words without sounding dense or bigoted. I'm not sure this was intentional or perhaps a sloppy script by writer/director John Logan, but it probably helps less accepting Peacock-subscribers find some level of familiarity in the sometimes, ahem, traditional depiction of non-traditional lifestyles.

"They/Them" which is pronounced "They Slash Them," at least has its heart in the right place, and isn't out to make fun of anyone, except maybe those who run conversion camps. That's a really good thing, but sadly, the best thing about the film, aside from Mr. Bacon's presence, is its clever name.

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